There is sore and then there is SORE

QIC: Zima

Date: 11/19/18

PAX: Van Gogh (WB), Zuckerburg, Greenspan, Ziggy Stardust, Balco, Ink Spot (WD), Red Eye, Snooki, Root Canal, Zima (QIC)

Title: There is sore and then there is S-O-R-E

Date: 11/19/18

Q: Zima

PAX: Van Gogh (WB), Zuckerburg, Greenspan, Ziggy Stardust, Balco, Ink Spot (WD), Red Eye, Snooki, Root Canal, Zima (QIC)

Introduction.

On this particular day in history, my body is more sore than on any other day that I’ve been on this earth. Having just participated in a Spartan Ultra Beast event, every single muscle that is in any way attached to my skeleton is expressing its displeasure about what I just put it through. It’s like a labor union for muscles that have banded together to fight the injustice. There’s no other explanation. How could running a race cause my jaw muscles to hurt? And my toes? They must be revolting in solidarity with my rectus femori. And who knew there were elbow muscles? Which, by the way, have randomly decided not to work properly anymore. Go figure.

Anyway, all that’s just to say that I had to come up with a workout that was still worthy of the attending PAX, but would allow the Q not to strain myself physically or stretch myself mentally by, you know, counting to 3. So rather than reinvent the proverbial wheel, why not just recycle an old weinke and pray that there aren’t too many repeat customers. Eenie-meenie-miney-mo, which one of these fits the AO? And BINGO, there it is.

Warm-o-rama.

SSH, Abe Vigodas, Whirly with the Clap, Imperial Storm Troopers, Spider Merkins

Beatdown.

Grab the shovel flag and let’s mosey. Find the X because X marks the spot (ok, there was no X) and plant the flag to mark our start point.

WARM UP LAP around the north loop of Leinbach Park. Describe the beatdown as the Q desperately and painfully tries to loosen his legs. The mumble chatter game was strong from the jabronis, mostly from Red Eye and Balco, but I’m pretty sure that everyone got in a shot. Don’t let Ink Spot’s unassuming exterior fool you. He’s a mean SOB.

MAIN EVENT.

Start at the shovel flag. Run counter clockwise to:

Cone 1 and do 10 Pulse Lunges. Run back to shovel flag and do 10 Mountain Climbers.

Cone 2 and do 20 Carolina Dry Docks. Run back to shovel flag and do 10 Mountain Climbers.

Cone 3 and do 30 Hand Release Merkins. Run back to shovel flag and do 10 Mountain Climbers.

Cone 4 and do 40 Burpees. Run back to shovel flag and do 10 Mountain Climbers.

Cone 5 and do 50 Monkey Humpers. Run back to shovel flag and do 10 Mountain Climbers.

Cone 6 and do 60 Merkins. Run back to shovel flag and do 10 Mountain Climbers.

Cone 7 and do 70 Heels to Heaven. Run back to shovel flag and do 10 Mountain Climbers.

Cone 8 and do 80 Sumo Squats. Run back to shovel flag and do 10 Mountain Climbers.

Cone 9 and do 90 SSHs. Run back to shovel flag and do 10 Mountain Climbers.

Cone 10 and do 100 WWI LBC. Run back to shovel flag and do 10 Mountain Climbers.

Mary.

Just enough time for:

25 Pickle Pounders IC

15 WWIIs IC

Out of Time.

Deep Thoughts from the Q:

All in all, not too difficult of a workout. It was a bit over 2 miles of running and about 700 total reps. YHC was aiming to raise the intensity level slightly, but couldn’t muster the bones to go any faster. #Kotters to those with higher expectations. I owe you one. See you at my next scheduled Q in two weeks.
Zuck got confused. He must have thought Speed Trap was launching from Leinbach this morning. When he realized his mistake and that it was just a boring old bootcamp instead, he graciously decided to honor us with his presence. #BootcampKotters.
A few PAX got off easy without penalty burpees for being late. That was a #QFail as he didn’t notice the PAX stealthily sneaking in.
By the way, who knocked over the port-a-john? And is there somebody stuck inside?
Snooki is amazed by how well the Q can coordinate a three count with such fluid body movements. Don’t be jealous.
Root Canal must have eaten his Wheaties this morning. He was out in front, causing Van Gogh some “top dog” distress.
Greenspan thought the workout was too easy and has HC’ed for the next Ultra.
Ziggy is still complaining about the excessive number of reps. I can hear him from here.
Not a single member of the PAX showed up from the last time this workout was led. The plan worked like a charm.

Announcements:

Prayers for everyone affected by the Business 40 closure – all of the travelers and all of the businesses.
Thanksgiving Convergence at Hanes Park on Thursday at 7 am.
Murph at Hanes Park on Thursday at 5 am. Apparently there’s also a run starting at 3 am.
December 15: F3/FiA Christmas part and 5 year F3 celebration. Leave your kids at home

Prayers:

Root Canal so very expertly took us out. That man is on a whole other plan of existence.

Zima out.

There is sore and then there is SORE