The Enigma Machine
QIC: Zima
Date: 12/3/18
PAX: Razzie, Huckleberry, Cobra, Toe Tag, FNG Loin Cloth (fka Joshua Keilty), Undertow (WD), Benjamin Button (co-WB), Stats (co-WB), BAM, Turnover, Blue Steel, Zima (Q for the day)
Title: The Enigma Machine
Date: 12/3/18
Q: Zima
PAX: Razzie, Huckleberry, Cobra, Toe Tag, FNG Loin Cloth (fka Joshua Keilty), Undertow (WD), Benjamin Button (co-WB), Stats (co-WB), BAM, Turnover, Blue Steel, Zima (Q for the day)
Introduction.
It’s not much of a secret that when I Q a workout, my intention is to get the PAX to feel like it was worth it to get out of bed that morning. If I’m waking up at 4 a.m., the beatdown better be damn well worth the effort. I don’t want anyone leaving the AO having regrets over posting because they didn’t get a good enough workout. In my ever so humble opinion, I think I’ve had some decent successes. On the other hand, there have been some failures. There have a been a few swings-and-misses in which an idea didn’t quite pan out. But nothing ventured, nothing gained … right? Take a risk … right? OK, so today’s workout wasn’t a complete failure, but it also wasn’t exactly as high on the intensity scale as I was aiming for. It ended up being more of an interesting idea that a full-scale, solid beatdown.
Warm-o-rama.
Roaming warmup consisted of Spider Merkins, Whirlies with the Clap, Imperial Storm Troopers, Arm Destroyers, and Side Straddle Hops.
Beatdown.
On a wet and soggy Waterfall Field (the site of many a rugby game in my youth), the idea was for the PAX to “choose their own adventure”. The pool of potential locations and exercises were set, but it was up to the PAX to determine which exercises we did, where we did them, and how many reps we did. Taking turns, a member of the PAX would provide the Q with a 3 digit number and then the Q would plug that number into the simple matrix below.
| Round | Offset | # | Corner | Exercises (min) | Abs (20 IC) | Reps | |
| 1 | 3 | 1 | 1 | Burpees (10 OYO) | Plank Jack | 4 | |
| 2 | 2 | 2 | 2 | Merkin 6 pack (IC) | WWII | 5 | |
| 3 | 2 | 3 | 3 | Squats (20 IC) | Heels to Heaven | 2 | |
| 4 | 5 | 4 | 4 | Reverse Lunges (10 OYO) | Low Flutter | 7 | |
| 5 | 6 | 5 | Middle | Mountain Climbers (10 IC) | Low Dolly | 3 | |
| 6 | 7 | 6 | 1 | Sprints | WWI LBC | 1 | |
| 7 | 4 | 7 | 2 | Mike Tysons (10 OYO) | Full Extension Crunches | 6 | |
| 8 | 7 | 8 | 3 | Monkey Humpers (20 OYO) | Box Cutters | 9 | |
| 9 | 8 | 9 | 4 | Carolina Dry Docks (10 OYO) | Pickle Pounders | 8 | |
| 10 | 6 | 0 | Middle | BOMBS (OYO) | American Hammers | 0 |
The group made it through about 12 rounds, with (surprisingly) very few repeats.
Out of Time.
Deep Thoughts from the Q:
- Nice to workout this morning with a few guys that I don’t often see. Too bad we didn’t have more time to chat. And I guess it was cool to workout with the familiar guys too.
- Cobains to Huck for the arm work. But in his defense, his one-handed Burpee form and speed was still better than the majority of PAX, the Q included. The man is either tough as nails or just plain insane. Who comes to a beatdown with a separated shoulder?
- For a special F3 discounted fee, YHC is available to lead a cadence workshop.
- Impressive that the co-WBs were Hates. Where were the real babies?
- Despite Cobra’s desire to be Alan Turing, he could not break the code of the Q’s matrix. Bletchley Park, this was not.
- YHC forgot to point out the front door of Pure Barre for anyone who was afraid to get a little damp this morning on the field.
- Blue Steel (shorts/tank top) and Cobra (pants/jacket/hat/gloves) clearly use different weather apps.
- There was quite a bit of mumblechatter this morning, but YHC was too busy doing simple math to pay any attention. Sorry if I missed anything good. Sound off in the comments if there’s anything that shouldn’t stay at the workout.
Announcements:
- Tomorrow is a Double Down for Double Down (F3 Louisville) who is having surgery. Wear black. Take a picture with the Ace of Spades.
- December 15: F3/FiA Christmas party and 5 year F3 celebration. Leave your kids at home. If you didn’t get the email from Bluto, see Van Gogh because your email address is wrong on the website.
FNG:
- Joshua Keilty is a head master at Summit School. He was EH’ed by Toe Tag (about time he brought someone out). Came here from Vegas. A fortune tell foretold his future attire as loin cloths and buckskin. (I think I would ask for my money back.) This administrator at a school for children promised to wear that outfit at the next workout. Suggestions included Leslie Chow from The Hangover, something from the Flintstones, Rushmore references, anything to do with Animal House, May I Please Have Another, … but we settled on Loin Cloth. Welcome. By the way, this is what happens when you have too many doctors and not enough marketing professionals in your workout group.
Prayers:
- Blue Steel’s brother, Stuart. Coming home for the holidays.
- In absentia, Thistle took us out. (Yes, I unapologetically stole his post.) See his Facebook post. But since I hate social media and don’t have Facebook, I can’t link to it.
Zima out.
