Feels Like the Very First Time
QIC: Zima
Date: 3/12/19
PAX: Offsides, Huckleberry, Van Gogh (WB), Blue Light Special, Mutton (WD, but only if you believe the Gregorian calendar), Balco, Zima (Q for the day)
Warm-o-rama.
- Snooki HR Burpees x 5 OYO (specially formulated for Offsides)
Mosey in parking lot
- Run back and forth for about 50 yards as a group with increasing speed x 4
- Jailbreak the same distance x 2
Drop and Do:
- WMDs x 50 OYO
- Mountain Climbers for the Six (the Q didn’t think that one through)
- Jump Squats x 50 OYO
- Mountain Climbers for the Six
It was here that the PAX began to question whether the Q actually had any kind of plan for the day or was making it up on the spot.
Beatdown.
Corpening Plaza
- Box Cutters x 25 IC (bear crawl to next spot)
- Heels to Heaven x 25 IC (bear crawl to next spot)
At this point, the Q squashed all rumors of a randomly made up beatdown when he reached into his pants and pulled out his Weinke.
- Low Flutter x 25 IC (bear crawl to next spot)
- WWI LBCs x 25 IC (bear crawl to next spot)
- Run a lap
- Bunny Hop up the stairs
BB&T (rapid fire by the picnic tables)
- Derkins, Box Jumps, Dips, WWIIs x 20
- Derkins, Box Jumps, Dips, WWIIs x 15
- Derkins, Box Jumps, Dips, WWIIs x 10
- Derkins, Box Jumps, Dips, WWIIs x 5
Parking Deck (8 I-Beams per level)
- Level 1: Single Burp-Up at each I-Beam (8 Merkins, 8 Pullups)
- Level 2: Double Burp-Ups at each I-Beam (16 Merkins, 16 Pullups)
- Level 3: Triple Burp-Ups at each I-Beam (24 Merkins, 24 Pullups)
- Level 4: Quadruple Burp-Ups at each I-Beam (32 Merkins, 32 Pullups)
Don’t Q what you can’t do. Besides the Q not being able to perform even one more pullup (in actuality, the form probably disappeared about 25 pullups prior), at least one other member of the PAX remarked that he was not getting any more benefit from “just hanging there”. We decided to stop the Burp-Up madness before we got to Level 5.
- Top Level:
- Deep Lunges (knee to the ground) x 20 IC each leg
- Crunchy Frogs x 20 IC
- Non-partner-assisted Pickle Pounders x 20 IC
Out of Time.
Deep Thoughts from the Q (note: some of these statements may not be entirely accurate):
- Balco, as usual, only had kind words for the Q. Not a single disparaging remark was said.
- Van Gogh’s Merkin and Pullup form was textbook perfect. He even offered himself some helpful advice.
- Sorry Huck, we ran out of time before we were able to do the Abe Vigodas. They were the next exercise on the list.
- Blue Light Special bitched and complained and quit 10 minutes into the workout.
- Mutton is a mean SOB who wouldn’t shut up.
- Offsides and Blue Light Special popped their Flatline cherries with each other this morning.
- As the Q, YHC entertained and implemented all of the extremely helpful suggestions from the numbnuts.
- Huckleberry claimed that his big muscles and small muscles were fighting each other during the Burp-Ups. I have no idea what that means.
Announcements:
- The Distillery is changing locations to Clemmons First Baptist Church. Van Gogh will obviously update the website, but will password protect it on Slack.
Prayers:
- For Blue Light Special when he finally gets home post-beatdown after leaving a canine “present” for his wife to handle this morning. Thanks for making this the last beatdown that you’re allowed to attend.
- For the children in Van Gogh’s household to get over their sickness.
Zima out.
