The Best of Flatline 2019

The Best of Flatline 2019

QIC: Turnover

Date: 12.31.19

PAX: $5 Footlong , H.O.G. (WB) , Honey Badger , Wobegon (WD) , Van Gogh , Turnover (Q)

YHC had his 2nd Q in as many days at #Flatline this morning.  As it was the final Flatline and final day of 2019, YHC thought it appropriate to pay homage to some of the more terrible Flatline beat downs from this past year.  This is not meant to discredit any beat downs or Q’s whose work did not appear in today’s beat down.  Flatline is regularly one of the tougher AO’s F3 Winston Salem has to offer and all of them are memorable (see: horrible) in their own way.  Without further ado, let’s see what the PAX of 6 got into this morning.

at 5:28am, YHC recited (see: read, again) the F3 Mission Statement and 5 Core Principles.

In Honor of Rust Bucket (Get Well Soon, Buddy!)

At the strike of 5:30, mosey to end of First Pres parking lot. Perform 1 Burpee at every parking spot going the length of one row. 21 spots = 21 Burpees.

Mosey to Parking Deck

In Honor of Van Gogh (“honor” is a strong word because this routine may have single-handedly been the worst of the year)

Backwards mosey from bottom of deck to the top where we all did 10 Deconstructed Burp-Ups. (10 Merkins, 10 Squat Jumps, 10 Burpees, 10 Pull Ups, 10 Burp-Ups).

Mosey down 1 level of parking deck and grab some wall

In Honor of Turnover* (* not really in honor of, it was just a convenient spot to re-visit a particularly terrible routine YHC had busted out in the past)

Descending Donkey Kicks (10 Donkey Kicks, 10 second hold, 2 Merkins…9 Donkey Kicks, 9 second hold, 2 Merkins…8 Donkey Kicks, 8 second hold, 2 Merkins..All the way down to 0)

Mosey down to Cherry street outside of First Pres and grab some more wall

In Honor of Greenspan – The A-L-A-R-M (going back through Greenspan’s BB of this workout was particularly unsettling as YHC remembers the speed and urgency with which Greenspan led the entire workout…YHC remembered feeling like we were under attack and we were just sprinting everywhere)

A – Get ups on the high wall x20

L – Lt. Dan’s x20 (most of the PAX admitted they were on a ‘Thistle Count’ after a while on this particular move, but thank goodness for Van Gogh keeping us on track)

A – Freddie Mercury x20 IC

R – Russian Dips x20 (10 each leg)

M – Dive Bomber Merkins x20 (the Truist** of tributes to Greenspan)

Mosey to beginning of Town Run

In Honor of Zima – Beast of Burden (another instance of ‘Oh my God, I can’t believe he called all that. That was awful’ when reading this BB. Really egregious stuff.)

6 light poles, 6 exercises, 6 reps each

Lightpole 1 – 6 Diamond Merkins

Lightpole 2 – 6 Full Extension Crunches

Lightpole 3 – 6 Copperhead Squats

Lightpole 4 – 6 HR Merkins (Zima prescribed HR Clap Mike Tyson’s, but as YHC is true to his word, there were exactly zero Mike Tysons called during this beat down).

Lightpole 5 – 6 Pickle Pounders

Lightpole 6 – 6 Alt. Lunges (6 each leg)

Once complete with one circuit, PAX would mosey back to beginning of Town Run and start again.  We only had time for 3 full laps of the Beast as we were running short on time and needed to get back to the First Pres lot for a classic that YHC DID NOT want to leave out.

Mosey back to First Pres Lot

In Honor of Mongoose / Huckleberry (while this particular routine had not been called at Flatline this year (to YHC’s recollection), it is still really terrible and YHC felt it would fit right in)

DB Bear Crawl Drills

Start at top of First Pres Lot and perform DB drills but in Bear Crawl fashion down the length of the parking lot. 21 spots = a crap ton of awful bear crawling/crawl bearing.

Circle up for Popcorn Mary

Honey Badger – Low Plank hold

Van Gogh – Van Gogh-da’s (sp?)

Wobegon – Mutton Crunch

Time’s Up

COT

Announcements / Prayer Requests

YHC has the Q at Mayhem tomorrow. As it is New Year’s Day, we will launch at 0700 from Meadowlark Elem.

YHC also has the Q at TRQ on Thursday

6th Anniversary Convergence on Saturday (1/4). 3 Phases – 1st phase launches from The Estate at 0545, 2nd phase will be at IS at 0700, 3rd phase will go back to The Estate from IS and end with a whole mess of 2nd F at Dough Joe’s. Van Gogh has committed to bringing a “cooler with some sort of beverage” for after the 3rd phase.

Prayers for $5’s hand and VG’s groin (any questions about VG’s groin can be directed to Honey Badger)

YHC took us out thanking Him for a great year.

Thanks for the keys $5. Always an honor to lead.