A-A-R-P til I D-I-E

A-A-R-P til I D-I-E

QIC: Tonka

Date: 9.27.2022

PAX: Schneider, Cruiser, SGT Shultz, Sea Man, Starfish, Uturn, Ziggy Stardust, Subfloor, Adobe

YHC’s foot has been ailing him as of late. Conveniently, the amount of rest and “putting my feet up” I’ve been doing served as inspiration for this beatdown. The notion of retirement and what it would be like to put my feet up all the time started to gain traction. One of the great names in the retirement world, AARP rose to the surface, and thus a new F3 beatdown acronym was born.

WRM

SSH (the Q just flapped his arms while the remaining PAX danced around him flaunting their youthful agility and limber able bodies)

AV

Whirly

DWD/UWD

Lunge Stretches

1.5 min OYO stretching

THANG

Premise: Perform each exercise listed to failure (until your form is no longer perfect). Move to the next exercise called. Repeat, cycling through the list over and over until final destination is reached.

TO THE STARTING LINE ON THE BOARDGAME OF LIFE (AKA first painted stripe of the parking lot)

AARP TO RETIREMENT/FAILURE
A – ARMS
MERKINS
A – ABS
LBC
R – RUCK/RUN
10 GORILLA STEPS
P – PLANK
LOW PLANK

(The original plan was to traverse the entire parking lot to the wall, but after 15 minutes of the above and the wall still 2.347 miles away, we called uncle and assembled at the far end of the carpool line for a plot twist and unforeseen career change.)

AL GORE TO RETIREMENT/FAILURE

TURN AROUND AND RETURN TO START WITH THE 2^ND ROUND OF AARP

AARP ROUND 2 TO RETIREMENT/FAILURE
A – (LOWER) APPENDAGE – LEGS
MONKEY HUMPERS
A – ABS
CRUNCHY FROG
R – RUCK/RUN
10 BEAR CRAWL STEPS
P – PLANK
LOW PLANK

MARY

PENQUIN CRUNCH

MUTTON CRUNCH R&L

6 INCHES

BODY DESTROYERS

ANNOUNCEMENTS

IPC Week 4 @ Distillery – I’ve been told all should bring their running shoes.

Greenest Oct 15 – Need crew and Q. Contact Starfish if available.

T-claps to Sourmash and others for completing an adopt-a-street event recently.

Cruiser has an open house for his Physical Therapy clinic in Winston Salem Thursday 9/29 – drinks and food provided – reach out to Cruiser on Slack for more details.

PRAYER REQUESTS

Hurricane Ian and those preparing for landfall.

NMM

I clearly underestimated the abilities of the PAX with this beatdown. I thought that within 3 rounds, the reps would drop drastically and we would start covering ground in chunks. That was not the case however, as each PAX would crank out rep after rep and it was a slow, grueling, soul-crushing pace across the parking lot.

To reiterate the first point, this workout was designed to be awful, and I think several thought that it was, but there was no sign of retreat or weakness in the whole lot. Everyone put their head down and made YHC feel proud (and a little guilty for filling 45 minutes with 8 exercises.)

It was good to see Subfloor back in the gloom after a fit of the “Manflu”. Symptoms include, but are not limited to: fever, nausea, fatigue, helplessness, need for assistance from your wife who seemed to not be hindered at all from the sickness herself which makes you feel sad and emasculated. This is more or less his description of the diagnosis.

Adobe has been grinding on some stellar Parliament shirt designs recently. I got a peek of them this morning and I was super pumped about it. Count me in for the preorder!

Cruiser came in clutch with some stretches and exercises to help YHC with his foot. Maybe I won’t need to retire early after all! We are lucky to have him around.

SGT Shultz was in the zone this morning during his gorilla and bear crawls. He kept muttering, “Think fast, run fast.” over and over again. I think he’s been training for his plan to disguise himself as a college student and tryout for their football team this fall.

U-turn drifted into his parking spot 1 minute late, I suspect to make a spectacle of his namesake for all the PAX. He missed my brief monologue to open warmorama, so the retirement banter likely didn’t make much sense to him. Really glad to have him this morning.

Schneider has to be the most consistent Parliament attended PAX. I don’t think I’ve ever posted without his company and it’s always a pleasure.

Sea man’s son plans to attend the Clemson v. State football game this Saturday evening (7:30PM start) and then make the 3.5hr trek back to WS after the game ends (roughly 4AM arrival) and THEN go to work the next morning at 6AM. Prayers for his sanity as a father.

Ziggy Stardust told of a story this AM about getting spotted by a student as he inspected the railway trestle by Baily Park – used often for pullups at the Urban Assault AO – on a Thursday afternoon by himself with no context. He had a hard time explaining the behavior to the poor lad, but in truth all F3 behavior is highly suspect and hard to explain.

Starfish can take the burn better than anyone I’ve met in Dash-PAX land. I’ve written on this before about his wall sits. He was toward the rear each time I checked, which for this workout means you’re cranking out the highest reps and the longest planks of the group. Always impressed with his performance.

There were several cracks made about retirement and how many of us aren’t that excited about it anymore after this morning.

Enjoyed it Gents. Thanks for letting me lead.

Tonka