Burns’ Back2School Special
QIC: Burns
Date: 8.26.23
PAX: Everyone and their mama
23 dudes brought their notebooks and took a refresher course on the basics this morning before school starts up on Monday.
19 of them were some of F3WS’s finest pax: Van Gogh, Cruiser, Adobe, Zima, Jolly Rancher, White Claw, Root Canal, Rudolph, Tonka, Wobegon, Subfloor, Huckleberry, Workbench, Ziffel, Popeye, Swifty, Rustbucket, Rubber Ducky, and Drip.
3 of them were FNGs: Dazzler, GameStop, and Matchbox. More on them later.
1 of them was YHC, bleary-eyed and about 30 seconds late, casting all kinds of attention on my recent attendance record. Unofficially the toll roads into Clemmons from southern VA were backed up. Officially, the dog got out on my way out the door this morning.
There were also 2 runners, Skyline and Sassy, the latter of whom is training for the Chicago Marathon and the former of whom is a #HIM that accompanied the Sassmaster on a 10-mile trek.
VG took care of the 5 core principles, mission statement, and disclaimer so YHC couldn’t time waste at all upon arrival – we got going with our WoR at about 07:01:15.
WoR: SSH x15 IC, Hillbillies x15 IC, Abe Vigoda x6 IC, Whirlies x15 IC, Mountain Climbers x15 IC, Copperhead Merkins x15 IC, Jack Reachers x10 IC, Michael Phelps x10 IC.
The Thang, pt. 1: To prepare for Monday, I thought it prudent to review how to count to 10. We started with 1 rep, then added a new exercise with an additional rep all the way up the following ladder:
- 1 burpee
- 2 pullups
- 3 merkins
- 4 jump squats
- 5 bonnie blairs
- 6 plank jacks
- 7 dips
- 8 WWIIs
- 9 mountain climbers
- 10 burpees
The Thang, pt 2: Pax having shown adequate recollection of proper ascending numerical order, we grabbed coupons and slowly made our way to the front of the church to review our ABCs. Each exercise was called x50 OYO, followed by a lap of the parking lot.
A is for Abdombinal – 50 American Hammers OYO (block optional)
A is for Arm – 50 Curls
B is for Back – 50 Bent over rows
B is for Butt – 50 Static lunges (25 each leg, block optional)
C is for Chest – 50 Chest press
C is for Calves – 50 Calf raises (block optional, block overhead extra optional)
We returned our blocks to their places of rest and that was all we ended up having time for, no called Mary other than a #plankforthesix. VGs watch had over 2 miles covered, and plenty of reps before breakfast for all!
FNGs
Dazzler, formerly known by his hospital name Billy, attends church with Rudolph, and is a comic book enjoyer and a remarkable singer (per Rudolph), so we landed on Dazzler after some other suggestions. He loves the gym (and looks like it too) but admitted that the cardio was good for him and he plans on being back out soon
GameStop, fka Michael, is Rudolph’s neighbor. He works as a financial advisor and after some discussion about other names that I’m certain we’ve named people before who didn’t come back out, we settled on GameStop. Some of our pax who aren’t chronically online like YHC needed a crash course on the Reddit-driven stock value manipulation scheme of 2022. I anticipate Rudolph’s EH will work again soon with GameStop.
Matchbox, fka Tonka’s brother, will be taking his new name back with him to the Greenville, SC area. We threw out some Clemson-related names due to his Tiger fandom – Spurrier, Cocky, etc. – but stuck with the toy car/truck theme in the end. Their other brother is Hot Wheels so it worked out perfectly.
NMM
Nothing really to say here. Yall were awesome all morning. 7 double-downers from SuperMax. Some legitimate concern that B would be for burpees but those fears were tempered. Zima let everyone know we don’t wake up for easy. All three of our FNGs absolutely tore it up today. To no one’s surprise, VG was out front most of the morning. Major #KOTTERS to Rustbucket, home from spending the summer in New York.
Announcements
Iron Pax Challenge is coming. Unless your name is Lamb Chop I hope you consider trying at least one of the workouts. It’s a great way to push yourself. The event formerly known as Shmedfest is happening as I type this backblast. We will have a convergence on Labor Day at 0630 at Iron Throne. RnG will launch at 0545 for a double down opportunity. BOLO for info about the Climb to Remember.
CoT
Keep Popeye in your prayers, dealing with some really hard family-related challenges. Prayers for students, parents, and teachers as school gets back in session.
Van Gogh, the keys start with K. Do with that what you will.
