DAYS SINCE PANDEMIC BEGAN: 686 – The Jungle Descends

QIC: Tonka

Date: 01.28.2022

PAX: Root Canal, Frostbite, Ziggy Stardust, Drip, Post Hole, Transcript, Crash, Lamb Chop

PREBLAST (Posted 01.27.2022)

Day 685 of the pandemic. Our cities have returned to nature. The jungle has descended. Man-eaters roam the streets. Natural selection is at full tilt. Chaos reigns. Come to urban assault and learn to think like a predator before you become the prey.

WM

  • Burpees x10
  • mike Tyson x10
  • Dive bombers x10
  • Lunge stretch each leg w/ Opp arm reach to the sky
  • Side lunge hold each leg
  • Whirlies
  • Groin stretch
  • AV real slow
  • Mosey to the parking deck

THANG

Welcome to the Jungle – The Pax took a deep dive into the mind of several predators that have begun to roam the streets of Winston since the onset of the pandemic shut down. At the end of each immersion experience, the Pax returned to their vulnerable human forms and learned the basics of evasion from the aforementioned predators: Duck, Dip, Dive, Dodge and Jump (aka burpees).

  • Partner Up
    • One partner – Baboon pull-ups under the railroad tracks x10
    • Other partner – Dying Cockroaches until relieved (don’t tell me cockroaches are not predators)
    • Repeato x3
  • Duck, Dip, Dive, Dodge and Jump x10
  • Leopard Prowl (crawl like a cat: knees low, head up, back flat) to the far side of the parking garage
  • DDDDJ x10
  • Gorilla Walk the next level of the parking garage
  • DDDDJ x10
  • Alligator Crawl (real low bear crawl) back to the previous start line
  • DDDDJ x10
  • Crane Stealth (lunge) Walk back to the railroad tracks
  • DDDDJ x10
  • Creepy Crawly Critters (crab) Walk to the far side
  • DDDDJ x10
  • Vicious Goose Walk back to the railroad tracks
  • DDDDJ x10

The DDDJs are a highly technical and effective evasion tool when avoiding a predatory attach, however, there seemed to be a rising anxiety among the Pax that when the rubber met the road, this training alone would not protect them from a charging goose, or a swinging baboon, etc. So following our conceptualization of each predator, we performed a more practical case study on an instinctual, evolutionary human defense mechanism: RUN FOR YOUR LIFE

  • Wind Sprints across the first level – 4 stops
  • Mosey back to start for Mary

MARY

Full Disclosure: The Q’s plan for Mary was 10 minutes of alternating planks and 6”. After realizing how absolutely brutal that would be after only 4 minutes, YHC called an Omaha to allow the pax to contribute some alternative abdominal beatdown ideas.

  • 6 inches (w/ hands up) 1.5 minutes
    • 6” hold
    • Flutter
    • Wide hold
    • 6” hold
    • Flutter
  • Plank 1.5 minutes
    • High
    • Low
    • High
    • Side
    • Side
    • High
  • 6 inches Reprise
    • 30 more seconds
  • Penguin Crunch x15 IC
  • Mutton Crunch x15 IC ea. Leg
  • (Lamb Chop) LBC x20 IC
  • (Dr. Toot) WWIII x4 IC ea. Leg
  • (Frostbite) Jump Squats x10 OYO
  • Body Destroyers for the last 15 seconds

TIME

COT

The jungle has not descended upon us, literally. But there are a lot of man-eating beasts that roam our lives and want to devour us. Some of these are literal people, hardship and suffering, worries, life situations, interpersonal conflicts, career stress, mental health struggle, etc. In reflection on a stressful week for YHC, I have found tremendous peace in trusting that I am never alone. I believe Jesus at His word when He says, “…I am with you always, to the end of the age.” (Matt. 28:20) Also, “In this world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33) I find these words to offer broader, outside peace in the midst of stress and struggle. I rarely actually trust this and choose that peace, favoring my own competency to micromanage every detail to weather the storm. And I’m often left weary and defeated, breaking more things than I’ve saved.

I’m thankful for F3 for this reason. I believe that we are truly never alone, even in solitude, and I hope that each Pax considers that. But I also believe that we have been given a tremendous gift in this community and each of the Pax beside us across our region. I see the community of men around me as the physical manifestation of this “never-aloneness”. Friends that would help you ward off the predators that overpower us. That’s a powerful thing.

PRAYER REQUESTS

  • Lamb Chop and his M in their hope to have a child.
  • I apologize if I forgot other announcements or prayer requests, I deleted the recording of our COT accidentally.

NMM

  • Transcript was wishing the Q would call for the sloth exercise by the end of our jungle outing. Sheesh, me too, brother.
  • Post Hole must have gotten a minor degree in gorilla walks. He had literal dust from the parking garage clouding up from his heels as he sped past the rest of us.
  • Lamb chop was the Q’s conscience throughout, often asking if YHC regretted any choices made for a given exercise, kindly offering up an easier one, or graciously suggesting a lower rep count. It’s always good to have an ally out there.
  • Drip was all smiles to be back in the gloom and, as always, made YHC feel like everything was going to be alright. He always seems to steady the ship.
  • Crash was out in front for most of the exercises. I aim to please this man with a good theme – he is ever the creative when it comes to a good themed workout. I appreciated his stamp of approval at the end.
  • Frostbite is the first Pax I’ve ever known to call a jump squat exercise for Mary. No shame in your game though. It seemed to be the straw that broke my glutes for the rest of the weekend.
  • Root Canal at one point was describing the attributes of an apex predator. It all seemed really educational and accurate until he stated that they “drive cars”. I am now suspicious he was describing himself the entire time. YHC finds no fault in that claim.
  • Ziggy made it very clear during the wind sprints that his only concern was to outrun YHC (at the rear) in the event of being chased by a true predator.
  • Midway through the workout, the Q seemed to totally lose favor with Ziggy, who drove our carpool this morning, as he asked YHC how I planned to get home afterward. All in all, I appreciate his concern.
  • YHC held the rear for the ENTIRE workout. These gents must have been raised in the jungle. They were animals out there.

It was a pleasure serving this morning. God bless you men.

Tonka