Wandering FNGs, a Missing Tree, a Sweaty Mess, and “Fun” at Conspiracy

Wandering FNGs, a Missing Tree, a Sweaty Mess, and “Fun” at Conspiracy

QIC: Burlap

Date: 26 June 2024

PAX: Former FNG Nick who is now Smashburger (WB?), Frank-N-Beans (site Q), Mutton, former FNG Jim who is now First Alert (WD), and Burlap (QIC)

It was typical late June muggy morning just before dawn when four, no wait five, wait, is that six?  No, it’s just five, Pax gathered to create a new Conspiracy.  It went like this:

Warm-o-RAMA:

SSHs, Imperial Walkers, Copperhead Squats, Jack Reachers, arm swirlies forward and back, Hillbillies, all IC

Mosey over bridge to track

100 merkin ½ mile – 20 merkins, run 100 meters, 20 merkins, run 200 meters, 20 merkins, run 300 meters, 20 merkins, run 200 meters, 20 merkins.

Partner up for Dora 1-1-2-2 at tennis center benches.

Partner runs to touch the blue bin at end of covered area and back while other does

• 100 dips
• 100 derkins
• 200 squats
• 200 LBCs

Back for Mary:  low flutters, low dollies, Freddie mercuries, and penguin crunches.

Fin

COT

• Mutton has WIB tomorrow at Sherwood Plaza — nice convenient location to most pax.
• Prayers for First Alert’s daughter who is an EMT and was hurt on job yesterday.
• Prayers for FNB’s mother who had open heart surgery and is in and out of hospital with complications from time to time, including now.
• Prayers for Cheerio’s father fighting cancer and infections.
• YHC took us out.

NMM

• Frank N Beans was first there with shovel flag, then Nick the FNG came, along with Mutton and YHC.  Started with four.   YHC gave full mission stmt, 5 core principles, and his own version of a legal disclaimer:  don’t get hurt.
• Turns out that Nick works for Forsyth County Emergency Medical Services, so if he gets injured, he calls himself.
• During warm-o-rama, Nick spent maybe 20% of the time on his phone texting, which I thought was interesting, but turns out there was a second FNG that I missed who was having trouble finding our site.  He was on the other side of park at the high school.
• YHC purposefully warmed up the shoulders a good bit but lightly as the first part of the workout was shoulder/push-up heavy.
• Nick (nka Smashburger) and FNB lagged Mutton and YHC when we moseyed to the track.  Turns out they were directing Jim (nka First Alert) to the spot.   All is well when we gather up at the tennis center with First Alert on the way… until the workout starts sucking.
• It is not as bad as Starfish’s Burpee Mile, but the 100 merkin 1/2 mile sucks in the humid morning.  We picked up First Alert about halfway into it.  There was a sixth person who looked like an FNG walking to the track that I thought may be another FNG, but it was a dude who was gonna run quarter miles.
• YHC had planned to do the Dora 1-1-2-2 with running toward the Reynolds gym and up those steps and touching the trunk of that old huge tree — but it been taken down!  So YHC shortened the run slightly.  Good thing because the dips and derkins sucked after about 30 seconds.  “They paved paradise, and put up a parking lot.”
• YHC had planned more workout but the Dora took a while.  YHC has it saved and will use it later at Conspiracy or IS.
• The dude who was not the third FNG almost backed out over us during Mary — actually, he was careful and we didn’t have to move.  Another park visitor showed up at 6:15 with a sweet Datsun 280Z probably from the late 70s.  This is not related to the workout — just a free nugget.
• Both FNGs are from Lexington area and tried to post at what is apparently a defunct AO there.   They found our website and tried Conspiracy.  We are blessed to have them.
• Welcome former FNG Smashburger.  Turns out his full name is Melvin Nickson and goes by Nick.  I get that.   This brought to mind the sweet burger joint in Welcome, Nick’s.  We went with Smashburger.
• Welcome former FNG First Alert.  His daughter works with Smashburger.  He is my age, works in IT security, and was a firefighter for many years.  Grew up in Hicksville, OH (we kindly avoided that name), spent time in Chicago, California, and is pretty recent to NC.  We thought of smoke detectors and looked at brands like Kidde, but landed on First Alert as a double entrendre with IT security.
• T-Claps to Smashburger and First Alert for posting cold to this hot Conspiracy.

Honored to lead,

Burlap